On the way home with the loli, we remained silent, not saying a word. When we were still walking with Hao Ran, the loli would still chatter excitedly, beaming a bright smile. However, she quietened down soon after we parted.
“What a day.”
I tried to start a conversation, but it fell flat.
It was not so much of guilt from being the reason for her silence, but rather me not wanting to deal with the hassle of answering the loli’s mother’s questions if we returned like this.
“Why are you being so silent?”
“Ah! Uh… I’m not being silent…”
Seems like she was not used to lying, so her voice withered into silence. In any case, it was enough for me to know that she had something on her mind.
“Is it because I bumped into you in the morning?”
“Of course not, I’m not some immature kid.”
“Lying isn’t good for you. I can tell from your red face that you’re lying.”
“Eh? That can’t be! That’s not possible!”
The loli touched her face, obviously flustered. I looked at her and said, “That was a lie.”
“That was a lie.”
“You lied to me! I’m going to ignore Yu Fei!”
“You were silent from the start, isn’t that the same as ignoring me? Now you say you’re going to ignore me… Hey loli, would make up your mind.”
The loli was struggling to answer but I found it funny, oddly funny.
Resisting the urge to laugh, I stopped and turned around to look at the loli, “Nevermind about that, what was it that made you ignore me in the first place?”
“I’m going to get mad if you don’t speak up.”
“I thought that Yu Fei seemed to hate me.”
The loli finally came out with the truth and it seems that I was wrong. It wasn’t that the loli was ignoring me. Instead, she was afraid of saying something wrong, causing me to ignore her.
I reached out and patted her shoulder, gently saying, “Don’t worry, I won’t ignore you for no reason.”
“Then, why wouldn’t Yu Fei let me say that we went home together?”
So she could tell that I was diverting the topic on purpose earlier that morning.
I was a little surprised, but I also knew that I had been underestimating her all these time.
“I don’t want to be the center of attention.”
“Too much attention would only bring about tragedy. Plus, I’m not too interested in these kinds of things anyway.”
I replied to the loli before turning to walk away. The loli clearly couldn’t understand what I meant, but she still ran over and walked by my side.
“Does Yu Fei want to join us for dinner?”
“No aunty, it’s fine.”
I smiled and declined the aunty’s offer and was about to turn and leave but the loli yanked me into the house by my shirt.
I was slighted dazed as I looked at the loli before my eyes. By the time I came to it, it was already too late, the aunty had already shut the door and brought me to the living room.
“I’ll go change first, Yu Fei can take a sit first, anywhere is fine.”
Finishing, the loli headed into her room. I was still trying to wrap my head around the situation, so I put down my bag and sat on the sofa, waiting for the loli.
Soon, the loli appeared in her pyjamas. Seeing such a beautiful sight placed my mind at ease.
“So why did you pull me in?”
“I wanted to have a chat with Yu Fei.”
The loli took a seat beside me causing a soothing scent to drift over.
I tensed a little upon realising that the loli was right next to me. With a hint of nervousness, I asked the loli, “What do you want to talk about?”
“Fei Yu, do you dislike me?”
“No I don’t.”
“Then, why would you keep on avoiding me? Be it in school or on the way home…”
“The loli’s voice became softer and softer. It seems that my actions have significantly hurt her feelings.
I replied her as I did before, “That’s because I hate attracting attention.”
“Fui Yu, is it hate or fear?”
“What do you mean?”
“I noticed that Fei Yu’s would shake unnaturally when being looked by a lot of people.”
I clamped down on my right hand with my left hand when she mentioned my hand. At the same time, I retorted, “Don’t you think you’re jumping to conclusions?”
The loli looked at me while remaining silent. For some unknown reason, I felt a sense of guilt.
I had not recovered my composure yet so I could only manage to force a reply, “Stay out of this, it has nothing to do with you.”
Then I turned away, holding down my right hand with all my might, not daring to relax at all.